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| Fun Run 2012 - Here we come!! |
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| Getting a little violin lesson! |
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| Costume Contest |
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| Jack O'Lantern Pizza! |
Sunday, October 28, 2012
Pictures
We had the Fun Run this past Thursday. Was so much fun!! The girls had a lot of fun walking/running with friends. Madi spent some of her time taking pictures of kids for the school newspaper.
Halloween Weekend
Every year my parents' neighborhood has a fun party on the block. This year they had pony rides, bounce house, food, games, face painting and a costume contest. It was really chilly!!! Madi was super excited to wear her new cape. Grammy and Poppi came by and dropped it off in the morning. It is awesome!!!! So incredibly soft and looks perfect with the rest of the outfit.
We spent some time with Poppi and Grammy this morning. Just hanging out and chatting mostly. After Julia had her nap, we headed to my parents' house. It wasn't as large of an event as it has been in the past, but it was still fun. Riley and Jules rode the ponies and Madi and Riley got to go in the bounce house. The girls all loved the nothing bundt cakes and popcorn.
When it came time for the costume contest, the girls really weren't interested. Riley and Madi did decide to go up front and stand in line for a chance to win a prize. They had a contest for the most original costume and there were several kids who went up. They asked Madi what she was and what her name was. And she won!! She has a gift card to Main Event. Not sure how much it's worth, but it's really great that she won. After all, her costume is original! And awesome.
We went back to the house and had jack o'lantern pizzas from Papa Murphy's, changed into pjs and had a candle lit music time at the table with my mom showing her violin skills! She let Madi hold it and showed her how to use the bow. Madi loved it!
Then we went upstairs and watched the new Tinkerbell movie in their living room upstairs. Had popcorn and snuggled everywhere in the room. The girls had tons of fun and so did we. Madi said she wishes she could rewind the night because she loved it so much.
Today we went to church. I love that Riley and Madi often talk about what they learned and recite the memory verse together. It's really great.
This afternoon Madi finished IXL (She had laps one day this week and had to sit out of recess on Friday for not having her homework done. Actually she had it done, but cleaned out her bag where she had tossed all the papers instead of putting them in her binder. When she cleaned it out, she set them on the counter and we recycled them. And her homework was in the pile so she had to stay in and do it). I helped her with the end of the section by doing the problems and then going over each one with her. Very impressed with how great her math skills have come along. Her multiplication in particular is so much easier for her and she's gotten fast at it while still getting it correct. She then did her Fasttmath work. And got her iPod back!!!
We had planned to give her the iPod back this weekend. We were fairly busy with things on Saturday so we waited until her stuff was done on Sunday. She was so excited to have her games back. She hasn't had her iPod in a month now due to the lying. She now has it for Friday - Sundays but we aren't letting her take it into her room at night yet.
She had earned back the computer, but the day she earned it back she chose to open a blog under the name "Emily" and link it to ChatNow or ChatLog or something like that. Don't remember the whole name. And then opened up her twitter account. When asked about it all, she said she wanted people to be able to talk with her. We asked what kind of people. She wasn't really sure. We talked about cyber safety and the type of people who can be out there and how it is really in her best interest to play some games, chat with people she knows and not open accounts. She shared that she had opened the twitter account in the Philippines and that you didn't know about it. And then reopened it here to start chatting. There isn't anything on the account. And we have again taken away computer privileges because we told her that we needed to have time to go over limits and more cyber safety things that we thought she knew or did know, but wasn't using. She has access to Facebook to see pics when you tell her about it and she can do her homework and projects using the computer. I changed the password to her account so that we make sure she cannot access the twitter, chatnow/chatlog/whatever it is or the blog. I wasn't so worried about the blog. It's all about being able to talk about Artemis and Greek mythology. But being linked to chatting with others... just not a good idea. We'd rather be a little overprotective about it than not enough.
Her grades are doing awesome. Progress reports come home this week. As of right now, she has 100 in all of her english subjects and science. 94 in Social Studies, 97 in something else and 98 in Math. She's really doing great in them.
She's looking forward to seeing you in 20 days. It's going to come so soon!!!
We spent some time with Poppi and Grammy this morning. Just hanging out and chatting mostly. After Julia had her nap, we headed to my parents' house. It wasn't as large of an event as it has been in the past, but it was still fun. Riley and Jules rode the ponies and Madi and Riley got to go in the bounce house. The girls all loved the nothing bundt cakes and popcorn.
When it came time for the costume contest, the girls really weren't interested. Riley and Madi did decide to go up front and stand in line for a chance to win a prize. They had a contest for the most original costume and there were several kids who went up. They asked Madi what she was and what her name was. And she won!! She has a gift card to Main Event. Not sure how much it's worth, but it's really great that she won. After all, her costume is original! And awesome.
We went back to the house and had jack o'lantern pizzas from Papa Murphy's, changed into pjs and had a candle lit music time at the table with my mom showing her violin skills! She let Madi hold it and showed her how to use the bow. Madi loved it!
Then we went upstairs and watched the new Tinkerbell movie in their living room upstairs. Had popcorn and snuggled everywhere in the room. The girls had tons of fun and so did we. Madi said she wishes she could rewind the night because she loved it so much.
Today we went to church. I love that Riley and Madi often talk about what they learned and recite the memory verse together. It's really great.
This afternoon Madi finished IXL (She had laps one day this week and had to sit out of recess on Friday for not having her homework done. Actually she had it done, but cleaned out her bag where she had tossed all the papers instead of putting them in her binder. When she cleaned it out, she set them on the counter and we recycled them. And her homework was in the pile so she had to stay in and do it). I helped her with the end of the section by doing the problems and then going over each one with her. Very impressed with how great her math skills have come along. Her multiplication in particular is so much easier for her and she's gotten fast at it while still getting it correct. She then did her Fasttmath work. And got her iPod back!!!
We had planned to give her the iPod back this weekend. We were fairly busy with things on Saturday so we waited until her stuff was done on Sunday. She was so excited to have her games back. She hasn't had her iPod in a month now due to the lying. She now has it for Friday - Sundays but we aren't letting her take it into her room at night yet.
She had earned back the computer, but the day she earned it back she chose to open a blog under the name "Emily" and link it to ChatNow or ChatLog or something like that. Don't remember the whole name. And then opened up her twitter account. When asked about it all, she said she wanted people to be able to talk with her. We asked what kind of people. She wasn't really sure. We talked about cyber safety and the type of people who can be out there and how it is really in her best interest to play some games, chat with people she knows and not open accounts. She shared that she had opened the twitter account in the Philippines and that you didn't know about it. And then reopened it here to start chatting. There isn't anything on the account. And we have again taken away computer privileges because we told her that we needed to have time to go over limits and more cyber safety things that we thought she knew or did know, but wasn't using. She has access to Facebook to see pics when you tell her about it and she can do her homework and projects using the computer. I changed the password to her account so that we make sure she cannot access the twitter, chatnow/chatlog/whatever it is or the blog. I wasn't so worried about the blog. It's all about being able to talk about Artemis and Greek mythology. But being linked to chatting with others... just not a good idea. We'd rather be a little overprotective about it than not enough.
Her grades are doing awesome. Progress reports come home this week. As of right now, she has 100 in all of her english subjects and science. 94 in Social Studies, 97 in something else and 98 in Math. She's really doing great in them.
She's looking forward to seeing you in 20 days. It's going to come so soon!!!
Sunday, October 21, 2012
Fun Sunday
We went to church this morning. The kids service is focusing on their gifts and their talents and talking about what each kid can do that is important and awesome for God. Madi seems to really be loving it!
We came home and she did her Fasttmath and two sections of IXL (for talking in class). She had five minutes of laps on Friday at school. Has been doing an awesome job on her assignments and is enjoying being involved in so much at school.
Later in the day we played Hide and Seek. The girls all love this game and we've played it quite a few times more recently. Julia only counts to three and very quickly so you have practically no time to hide. Then she yells "I find you!" and laughs. Riley doesn't like to count because she's afraid she won't find us and fears that she'll feel bad if she doesn't find us well or that she'll be alone. So that leaves Madi and I to count for the most part. The girls have some really cool hiding places. Under beds. In cabinets in the bathroom - Madi hid under the sink in their bathroom today!!
I went in our room after counting to ten and saw that the hair dryer was in the bin in the middle of the floor. So I opened the cabinet to find Riley inside. She got out and I looked in our closet and she said "No one is in there." So we go to walk out and she points at Jeremy's cabinets in the bathroom. I open the door and Madi is inside. Madi gets out and says very kindly "Thanks for not telling where I was Riley!" And Riley says "You're welcome. I just pointed." Madi was like "What?! You told on me?" Riley started laughing when she realized that Madi figured out that she'd told with her hand. We all laughed hard about that one.
Towards the end of the game, I had Riley and Julia hide under Julia's bed and pulled the trundle out so you couldn't see them. Julia always sleeps on it out anyway so it's usually how the room looks. Madi had fun finding them and then joined them under the bed. I called down and had Jeremy come find the three of them. Julia and Riley did not want to get out from under there!! They loved it.
Tonight we had pulled pork and Madi talked about some of the things that you're hoping to do when you're here. She shared about getting a dog in a year, getting half of what you save buying groceries in money, World of Warcraft, etc... so we talked with her about how these are things you're definitely hoping to do and that they may happen but that she needs to realize that they may not happen in that time frame. That a dog may come in a few months or a few years and not to expect them exactly in a year or whatever. That it is just what would be ideal if all things work out. She kept saying certain times like "We'll do this in ___ years or I'll get ___ in ___ ." So we tried to help her understand that these are all things you're hoping to do and would like to do, but that it may take some time before they happen if they happen.
We came home and she did her Fasttmath and two sections of IXL (for talking in class). She had five minutes of laps on Friday at school. Has been doing an awesome job on her assignments and is enjoying being involved in so much at school.
Later in the day we played Hide and Seek. The girls all love this game and we've played it quite a few times more recently. Julia only counts to three and very quickly so you have practically no time to hide. Then she yells "I find you!" and laughs. Riley doesn't like to count because she's afraid she won't find us and fears that she'll feel bad if she doesn't find us well or that she'll be alone. So that leaves Madi and I to count for the most part. The girls have some really cool hiding places. Under beds. In cabinets in the bathroom - Madi hid under the sink in their bathroom today!!
I went in our room after counting to ten and saw that the hair dryer was in the bin in the middle of the floor. So I opened the cabinet to find Riley inside. She got out and I looked in our closet and she said "No one is in there." So we go to walk out and she points at Jeremy's cabinets in the bathroom. I open the door and Madi is inside. Madi gets out and says very kindly "Thanks for not telling where I was Riley!" And Riley says "You're welcome. I just pointed." Madi was like "What?! You told on me?" Riley started laughing when she realized that Madi figured out that she'd told with her hand. We all laughed hard about that one.
Towards the end of the game, I had Riley and Julia hide under Julia's bed and pulled the trundle out so you couldn't see them. Julia always sleeps on it out anyway so it's usually how the room looks. Madi had fun finding them and then joined them under the bed. I called down and had Jeremy come find the three of them. Julia and Riley did not want to get out from under there!! They loved it.
Tonight we had pulled pork and Madi talked about some of the things that you're hoping to do when you're here. She shared about getting a dog in a year, getting half of what you save buying groceries in money, World of Warcraft, etc... so we talked with her about how these are things you're definitely hoping to do and that they may happen but that she needs to realize that they may not happen in that time frame. That a dog may come in a few months or a few years and not to expect them exactly in a year or whatever. That it is just what would be ideal if all things work out. She kept saying certain times like "We'll do this in ___ years or I'll get ___ in ___ ." So we tried to help her understand that these are all things you're hoping to do and would like to do, but that it may take some time before they happen if they happen.
Friday, October 19, 2012
Fridays Rock!
Was a good week! Not too much to say about it really - other than it went REALLY fast!
Madi is doing good in her classes. She was able to help on Thursday in the library. She painted the one of the pumpkin signs for the pumpkin contest that is coming up. She's doing awesome in choir. They sound soooo good!! She loves the song "Magical Kingdom" by John Rutter. Also my favorite piece that they are doing. It's so fun and neat!
We are planning to go to the Arboretum tomorrow for our annual pumpkin trip! We got a membership last year in October and it expires at the end of the month. So all of us will go for free again. Not planning to renew it this year. Hoping to renew next year and use it again for two pumpkin patch times like we did this year. Spring is always so beautiful too.
Madi added some feathers to her bow and arrows today. Looks awesome!!! She'll have a fabulous costume this year for Halloween.
Madi is doing good in her classes. She was able to help on Thursday in the library. She painted the one of the pumpkin signs for the pumpkin contest that is coming up. She's doing awesome in choir. They sound soooo good!! She loves the song "Magical Kingdom" by John Rutter. Also my favorite piece that they are doing. It's so fun and neat!
We are planning to go to the Arboretum tomorrow for our annual pumpkin trip! We got a membership last year in October and it expires at the end of the month. So all of us will go for free again. Not planning to renew it this year. Hoping to renew next year and use it again for two pumpkin patch times like we did this year. Spring is always so beautiful too.
Madi added some feathers to her bow and arrows today. Looks awesome!!! She'll have a fabulous costume this year for Halloween.
Saturday, October 13, 2012
All A's!!
Madi had a fantastic report card. Earned all A's! Including two 100%!!! No tardies and no absences. The only comment was: "She spends a lot of time socializing with her peers." In other words, she talks too much in class. Very pleased to see her working hard and earning such great grades. A great reflection on how she is doing and how much effort she is putting in. So proud of her!!!
Decisions
I messaged this to you last night, but want to have it on here so that it is very clear as to why we are standing so firm on our decision for what will happen when you get back. We have spoken to a good friend of mine who is a licensed counselor and works at DBU as a professor of counseling for their master's program as well as serves as a personal counselor several days a week after school and on Saturdays. Jeremy and I took some time to think on it and pray to make sure it was the right thing to do. Here is the letter I sent:
Jeremy and I have had lots of talks about how things will be and what will be best for all involved when you come back in several weeks. I’m going to ask that you read all the way through to the end to understand fully where we are coming from.
We have been trying to figure out exactly how everything is going to work when you get back to the States. Obviously we can’t plan much in advance and we can’t know exactly how everything will work. But we can plan what we do know and make wise decisions based on the information that we have. And we’ve talked with a counselor as well as Jeremy talked to your parents today about our decision so that they would understand where we are coming from.
There are three items that are the top priority in regards to you returning to the States:
1. Madi
2. Your relationship with Madi
3. Madi
We believe that our role as parents needs to be transferred to you. That what is best for Madi is that you take the role as her Mom as soon as you are here. It will not benefit her to have you making decisions for her and us making decisions for her. It will not help her to view you as an adult and parent if you are following our household rules and taking the role of one of our children instead of leading as an adult in your home. And Madi being able to see you as her Mom and not her peer/sister/roommate will be very important from the moment you come. She will have respect for you if you take on the role of parent immediately rather than relying on us to help or co-parenting alongside you. She needs to see that you will provide and take care of her and act as the leader of your home – not in ours.
Madi will also need to know that you are the adult that she is to be loyal and listen to. That she can bring her gladness, sadness, worry, fear, and happiness to. That we will turn over the role of parent to you and that we will take on the role of uncle and aunt. She should not be torn between being loyal to you or loyal to us. Or worrying about making sure that you are ok. Or worrying about finances and adult worries. Or wondering how things will go when you’re on your own. And these are all things that she has felt or expressed concern about in various ways. She needs to see quickly that being together will be good and that she can be your daughter and you can be her mom. Without us being in the mix. And that you can make things work outside of our home. And that it is ok for her to be a child.
The most important thing will be for you both to reconnect and discover your relationship new. You had different roles in the Philippines and you will now have other roles when you come back. And you’ll need to learn each other again and develop your relationship without our influence.
All that being said, we have decided to give you a time frame to stay at our home as well as a firm date that you and Madi need to have your own place – whether that is renting an apartment month to month, Budget Suites or renting a house. The reason being that you can not become a unit and function in a healthy mother-daughter relationship if you are dependent on us as well or coexisting with us. It won’t be healthy for any of us.
Our time frame may seem short, but it is actually longer than was recommended to us. When you arrive, you and Madi will be able to stay with us for two weeks. December 1st will be your final day living with us and you will need to have other arrangements made by this date and be out of our home at or before this date.
We will have Madi partially packed the few days or week before you come. And we have already discussed all of this with her throughout this past week so that she can be preparing. Your parents are also aware of this. We wanted them in the loop so that they would understand we’re not doing it out of anger or bitterness or revenge or selfishness. That we truly want you and Madi to have a chance to make life work for you. And having us serve in our natural roles of Uncle and Aunt will be vital to helping you both figure out your relationships and reconnecting. We would be standing in the way to do something different.
It has taken us some time to think and pray about it. And we have not tried to wait until the last minute to talk to you. It has definitely been a process of deciding what is best for everyone involved.
You may feel slighted or frustrated or angry. But we do believe that you will come to understand that your family – you and Madi – and your roles together will be the most vital decision. And that to be in our home for a few months will not allow that relationship to develop correctly.
Please feel free to respond. We are firm on our date and the information and feel whole-heartedly that this will be best. I’ve tried to explain to the best of my ability in this letter. It may sound heartless and I hope it doesn’t. It may sound tough and yes, it is. But your role has to be that of Mom. And Madi will respect you so much more and be able to follow your leadership so much better as a result.
We love her. We love you.
Love,
Jeremy and Jess
Jeremy and I have had lots of talks about how things will be and what will be best for all involved when you come back in several weeks. I’m going to ask that you read all the way through to the end to understand fully where we are coming from.
We have been trying to figure out exactly how everything is going to work when you get back to the States. Obviously we can’t plan much in advance and we can’t know exactly how everything will work. But we can plan what we do know and make wise decisions based on the information that we have. And we’ve talked with a counselor as well as Jeremy talked to your parents today about our decision so that they would understand where we are coming from.
There are three items that are the top priority in regards to you returning to the States:
1. Madi
2. Your relationship with Madi
3. Madi
We believe that our role as parents needs to be transferred to you. That what is best for Madi is that you take the role as her Mom as soon as you are here. It will not benefit her to have you making decisions for her and us making decisions for her. It will not help her to view you as an adult and parent if you are following our household rules and taking the role of one of our children instead of leading as an adult in your home. And Madi being able to see you as her Mom and not her peer/sister/roommate will be very important from the moment you come. She will have respect for you if you take on the role of parent immediately rather than relying on us to help or co-parenting alongside you. She needs to see that you will provide and take care of her and act as the leader of your home – not in ours.
Madi will also need to know that you are the adult that she is to be loyal and listen to. That she can bring her gladness, sadness, worry, fear, and happiness to. That we will turn over the role of parent to you and that we will take on the role of uncle and aunt. She should not be torn between being loyal to you or loyal to us. Or worrying about making sure that you are ok. Or worrying about finances and adult worries. Or wondering how things will go when you’re on your own. And these are all things that she has felt or expressed concern about in various ways. She needs to see quickly that being together will be good and that she can be your daughter and you can be her mom. Without us being in the mix. And that you can make things work outside of our home. And that it is ok for her to be a child.
The most important thing will be for you both to reconnect and discover your relationship new. You had different roles in the Philippines and you will now have other roles when you come back. And you’ll need to learn each other again and develop your relationship without our influence.
All that being said, we have decided to give you a time frame to stay at our home as well as a firm date that you and Madi need to have your own place – whether that is renting an apartment month to month, Budget Suites or renting a house. The reason being that you can not become a unit and function in a healthy mother-daughter relationship if you are dependent on us as well or coexisting with us. It won’t be healthy for any of us.
Our time frame may seem short, but it is actually longer than was recommended to us. When you arrive, you and Madi will be able to stay with us for two weeks. December 1st will be your final day living with us and you will need to have other arrangements made by this date and be out of our home at or before this date.
We will have Madi partially packed the few days or week before you come. And we have already discussed all of this with her throughout this past week so that she can be preparing. Your parents are also aware of this. We wanted them in the loop so that they would understand we’re not doing it out of anger or bitterness or revenge or selfishness. That we truly want you and Madi to have a chance to make life work for you. And having us serve in our natural roles of Uncle and Aunt will be vital to helping you both figure out your relationships and reconnecting. We would be standing in the way to do something different.
It has taken us some time to think and pray about it. And we have not tried to wait until the last minute to talk to you. It has definitely been a process of deciding what is best for everyone involved.
You may feel slighted or frustrated or angry. But we do believe that you will come to understand that your family – you and Madi – and your roles together will be the most vital decision. And that to be in our home for a few months will not allow that relationship to develop correctly.
Please feel free to respond. We are firm on our date and the information and feel whole-heartedly that this will be best. I’ve tried to explain to the best of my ability in this letter. It may sound heartless and I hope it doesn’t. It may sound tough and yes, it is. But your role has to be that of Mom. And Madi will respect you so much more and be able to follow your leadership so much better as a result.
We love her. We love you.
Love,
Jeremy and Jess
Monday, October 8, 2012
Visit with Grammy and Poppi
Madi had a really great long weekend. No school today. Grammy and Poppi came over yesterday afternoon to spend time with the girls and watch them while we had work on Monday. Total blessing!!
Grammy took Madi and Riley to the fabric store to find some fabric that would work to make a cape and a sash for Madi's costume. They found some that they liked for the cape and then purchased the material for the sash. Grammy worked on the sash today as well as two small rings that cover up some of the velcro on the shoulders. Madi was wearing it when I got home and it looks awesome!!!
Madi made a bow and arrow set at my parents' house this weekend with a quiver. And then she printed off the cape instructions for Grammy. Can't wait to see how it looks!!!
She was a little emotional last night and a little emotional when they left - though she handled it better when they left today than last weekend. I think she realizes that she'll see them more often than we've been seeing them and I think seeing them makes her think more of you as well. I gave her a hug after they left and she settled right into getting ready for the day tomorrow. Was a low-key night and she was really tired. Looked quite tired by the end of the day.
Picture day is this Thursday. I'm excited to see what Madi will decide to wear and how she'll want her hair done!
Overall it was a really great weekend. Hoping that this week is another good week for her! I think her PAL comes from the High School to spend time with her on Friday?! And she'll have a chance to meet with Ms. T again this week which will be really nice. Other than that, I can't think of anything else going on!
Grammy took Madi and Riley to the fabric store to find some fabric that would work to make a cape and a sash for Madi's costume. They found some that they liked for the cape and then purchased the material for the sash. Grammy worked on the sash today as well as two small rings that cover up some of the velcro on the shoulders. Madi was wearing it when I got home and it looks awesome!!!
Madi made a bow and arrow set at my parents' house this weekend with a quiver. And then she printed off the cape instructions for Grammy. Can't wait to see how it looks!!!
She was a little emotional last night and a little emotional when they left - though she handled it better when they left today than last weekend. I think she realizes that she'll see them more often than we've been seeing them and I think seeing them makes her think more of you as well. I gave her a hug after they left and she settled right into getting ready for the day tomorrow. Was a low-key night and she was really tired. Looked quite tired by the end of the day.
Picture day is this Thursday. I'm excited to see what Madi will decide to wear and how she'll want her hair done!
Overall it was a really great weekend. Hoping that this week is another good week for her! I think her PAL comes from the High School to spend time with her on Friday?! And she'll have a chance to meet with Ms. T again this week which will be really nice. Other than that, I can't think of anything else going on!
Saturday, October 6, 2012
Fun Weekend
Madi spent the night at Elizabeth's house last night and then my parents picked her up at lunchtime to have a Madi day with her! She made a new bow for her costume because they couldn't find one that would work. The reviews were bad or it was too small or broke easy or was too expensive.
She can't wait to shop for her Halloween costume fabric. Has some great ideas!!
Tomorrow Grammy and Poppi come over so she'll go shopping for fabric with Grammy to help make some accessories for her costume.
She can't wait to shop for her Halloween costume fabric. Has some great ideas!!
Tomorrow Grammy and Poppi come over so she'll go shopping for fabric with Grammy to help make some accessories for her costume.
Friday, October 5, 2012
Fabulous Friday
Madi had a call last night from her friend Elizabeth. She was invited to come over her house for a sleepover and of course, we said she could. She packed her things last night and was ready to go! Didn't really get to talk to her much today at all. Didn't see her except for a minute as she was leaving the cafeteria from lunch and a few minutes while I dropped her off.
My parents are picking her up from the playdate tomorrow around noon and then spending some time with her in the afternoon. Expecting that she'll be pretty tired as they usually stay up pretty late.
On Sunday Poppi and Grammy will be coming into town and staying the night again so that they can watch Riley and Madi on Monday while I have meetings all day and Jeremy is work and Jules is at daycare.
Not sure how her day went today, but it will definitely be a nice long weekend for her!
My parents are picking her up from the playdate tomorrow around noon and then spending some time with her in the afternoon. Expecting that she'll be pretty tired as they usually stay up pretty late.
On Sunday Poppi and Grammy will be coming into town and staying the night again so that they can watch Riley and Madi on Monday while I have meetings all day and Jeremy is work and Jules is at daycare.
Not sure how her day went today, but it will definitely be a nice long weekend for her!
Wednesday, October 3, 2012
Good Day
The last two days have been good. We had some good talks with Madi yesterday and again today. She was able to talk with Ms. T, the counselor, today for about thirty minutes. She really enjoyed her time with Ms. T and said that she'd like to talk to her again sometime. So I'm going to talk to Ms. T tomorrow to see how to have Madi scheduled to see her on a regular basis. Madi said she'd like that as well. I'm not sure what that means or how often it would be, but it would be really great for her.
She and Jeremy had some good time together tonight. I put Julia down to bed and then was finally able to go into Madi's room to have some time with her. Has been really insane getting the girls down at a decent hour so that we could go into her room to read or chat at night. Is a really rare thing to be done before 9pm putting the girls down as they take longer to get to sleep. Anyway - I was able to chat with Madi for about ten minutes and we read some funny things from her Muse magazine.
Hoping to get her the magazine subscription again - both girls really loved having them all year long and was a really fun gift for them to get throughout the year.
Hoping that tomorrow is a great day as well!
She and Jeremy had some good time together tonight. I put Julia down to bed and then was finally able to go into Madi's room to have some time with her. Has been really insane getting the girls down at a decent hour so that we could go into her room to read or chat at night. Is a really rare thing to be done before 9pm putting the girls down as they take longer to get to sleep. Anyway - I was able to chat with Madi for about ten minutes and we read some funny things from her Muse magazine.
Hoping to get her the magazine subscription again - both girls really loved having them all year long and was a really fun gift for them to get throughout the year.
Hoping that tomorrow is a great day as well!
Monday, October 1, 2012
Turn Around
Today was a really great day. We were all a little bit more calm after the events of yesterday. Would make a great book (sort of):
The Case of the Missing Knife
We've had our chef's knife missing for several months. We noticed it missing after we got back from the cruise and after Poppi and Grammy were over sometime in June or May. Honestly can't remember the exact dates. But the knife is our largest in the house. And it wasn't to be found anywhere.
We even did a thorough search of Madi's room while she was gone one day. She was in a role play phase and was acting like an elfen and other characters so we thought that maybe she had taken it.
Yesterday she found it under her bed. She said she didn't take it and that it was just found and that she had no idea how it got there. In the recent events of being lied to about several things and being tested to no end, neither Jeremy nor I believed her. And we weren't shy about saying so. We couldn't understand how it couldn't have been her. She hasn't had anyone over. She's the only one that sleeps in the room.
It was suggested that Lauren, our babysitter, may have taken it into the room when she stayed with Jules while we were on the cruise. I could have sworn that she said she slept in Riley's room. I was very wrong on that one.
Last night Jeremy and I were trying to figure out the pieces and put it all together. We wanted to believe Madi but were having a very hard time trusting her. I went ahead and texted Lauren. When she didn't answer the text, I called and left a message. A few hours later, she replied that she was so incredibly sorry to have put Madi through this. She said she took the knife for protection as she gets very very scared at night when she is sleeping alone in a house. And she totally forgot she had put it there. And then Madi found it - it was weird timing - and it just looked fishy.
Jeremy and I feel so incredibly relieved to know that Madi was telling the truth and that she held her ground when we asked her several times this weekend.
First thing this morning, I apologized to her and Jeremy apologized to her. We did tell her that it is important to be truthful at all times as we would have been able to trust her response more had she not lied several times this past week and disobeyed out of lack of respect. We made it very short and definitely made it clear that we were in the wrong on this one. That we were sorry for making her feel guilty and that we just couldn't figure out the right answer until we got the text from Lauren.
We got to school and she and I had a good conversation just hanging out. Talking about nothing and everything at the same time. She mentioned that she was really nervous about the changes coming up. I told her that we all were and that she was probably the most nervous of all as new things are coming. I encouraged her to talk to our counselor. She'll be speaking with her tomorrow. It will be great for her to have a support system of people to help her adjust.
Ms. T, the counselor, and I spoke briefly this morning. She reminded me that we are going to be on a roller coaster of emotions these next seven weeks. That Madi will go from calm to hyper to sad to scared and back again many times. That the best thing we can do is stay calm and be security and reassurance of what we do know. And help her work through this time. She's looking forward to talking to Madi and I think it will be very helpful to her to have Ms. T.
After school, Madi and I got a little bit of time together just the two of us. She asked about our conversation yesterday and then talked again about some things. I mentioned that I knew that she felt that we didn't love her. She was surprised that I knew she had said that. I told her that Grammy and I had talked last night. And that I felt very sad to think she thought that. I told her that there was nothing she could do that would make us not love her and that she was like one of our own kids and we would always love her - no matter what.
She got very quiet and then said very sweetly "Thanks Aunt Jess. That Means a lot." And I told her it was true. Then we talked some more about random things and picked up Riley from her playdate and Julia from preschool.
Madi had a test today on the 50 states and locating them on a blank outline map. Oy!! This is definitely not anything she is familiar with or anything we'd expect her to be familiar with. Last year they focused on Texas alone. Much simpler and less to remember. She knows that she didn't do well as she could only remember four or five states. She can recite them alphabetically, but can't place where they are.
We have a map puzzle that she used tonight and we got some blank outline maps online and printed them to practice. It has been a challenge to keep up with the fifth grade work as there is more for her to remember to do and it's been tough to really know what is coming. So it's something we have to help her work on and get in a groove with so that she is more prepared for tests. Honestly she hasn't had to really study or work outside of school until this year. And now there are new things (especially and mostly in social studies) that she has had no exposure to.
Jeremy lay down on her bed tonight and helped her with some parts. I helped her with other parts. She told us that she thought we'd be mad that she didn't know it. We explained that there was never any reason for her to know it and that this is just an area we'll have to spend more time on with her to help her get it. That we have high expectations in areas where she does excel. In this area, it's more of our job to help her get it - not to push her hard. She was appreciative. We gave tons of hugs and good nights and had a very affectionate night which was really great.
I truly think this weekend helped us realize that she may be testing us like crazy and she may be pushing many buttons, but she truly just wants to know if she is loved and if we care. It is not easy raising an eleven year old and especially challenging when they are going through some big changes that many kids don't go through. It's a challenging time and it's a big growth period. But she's going to handle it just fine. And we'll all come out stronger and more wise than we were when we started!
The Case of the Missing Knife
We've had our chef's knife missing for several months. We noticed it missing after we got back from the cruise and after Poppi and Grammy were over sometime in June or May. Honestly can't remember the exact dates. But the knife is our largest in the house. And it wasn't to be found anywhere.
We even did a thorough search of Madi's room while she was gone one day. She was in a role play phase and was acting like an elfen and other characters so we thought that maybe she had taken it.
Yesterday she found it under her bed. She said she didn't take it and that it was just found and that she had no idea how it got there. In the recent events of being lied to about several things and being tested to no end, neither Jeremy nor I believed her. And we weren't shy about saying so. We couldn't understand how it couldn't have been her. She hasn't had anyone over. She's the only one that sleeps in the room.
It was suggested that Lauren, our babysitter, may have taken it into the room when she stayed with Jules while we were on the cruise. I could have sworn that she said she slept in Riley's room. I was very wrong on that one.
Last night Jeremy and I were trying to figure out the pieces and put it all together. We wanted to believe Madi but were having a very hard time trusting her. I went ahead and texted Lauren. When she didn't answer the text, I called and left a message. A few hours later, she replied that she was so incredibly sorry to have put Madi through this. She said she took the knife for protection as she gets very very scared at night when she is sleeping alone in a house. And she totally forgot she had put it there. And then Madi found it - it was weird timing - and it just looked fishy.
Jeremy and I feel so incredibly relieved to know that Madi was telling the truth and that she held her ground when we asked her several times this weekend.
First thing this morning, I apologized to her and Jeremy apologized to her. We did tell her that it is important to be truthful at all times as we would have been able to trust her response more had she not lied several times this past week and disobeyed out of lack of respect. We made it very short and definitely made it clear that we were in the wrong on this one. That we were sorry for making her feel guilty and that we just couldn't figure out the right answer until we got the text from Lauren.
We got to school and she and I had a good conversation just hanging out. Talking about nothing and everything at the same time. She mentioned that she was really nervous about the changes coming up. I told her that we all were and that she was probably the most nervous of all as new things are coming. I encouraged her to talk to our counselor. She'll be speaking with her tomorrow. It will be great for her to have a support system of people to help her adjust.
Ms. T, the counselor, and I spoke briefly this morning. She reminded me that we are going to be on a roller coaster of emotions these next seven weeks. That Madi will go from calm to hyper to sad to scared and back again many times. That the best thing we can do is stay calm and be security and reassurance of what we do know. And help her work through this time. She's looking forward to talking to Madi and I think it will be very helpful to her to have Ms. T.
After school, Madi and I got a little bit of time together just the two of us. She asked about our conversation yesterday and then talked again about some things. I mentioned that I knew that she felt that we didn't love her. She was surprised that I knew she had said that. I told her that Grammy and I had talked last night. And that I felt very sad to think she thought that. I told her that there was nothing she could do that would make us not love her and that she was like one of our own kids and we would always love her - no matter what.
She got very quiet and then said very sweetly "Thanks Aunt Jess. That Means a lot." And I told her it was true. Then we talked some more about random things and picked up Riley from her playdate and Julia from preschool.
Madi had a test today on the 50 states and locating them on a blank outline map. Oy!! This is definitely not anything she is familiar with or anything we'd expect her to be familiar with. Last year they focused on Texas alone. Much simpler and less to remember. She knows that she didn't do well as she could only remember four or five states. She can recite them alphabetically, but can't place where they are.
We have a map puzzle that she used tonight and we got some blank outline maps online and printed them to practice. It has been a challenge to keep up with the fifth grade work as there is more for her to remember to do and it's been tough to really know what is coming. So it's something we have to help her work on and get in a groove with so that she is more prepared for tests. Honestly she hasn't had to really study or work outside of school until this year. And now there are new things (especially and mostly in social studies) that she has had no exposure to.
Jeremy lay down on her bed tonight and helped her with some parts. I helped her with other parts. She told us that she thought we'd be mad that she didn't know it. We explained that there was never any reason for her to know it and that this is just an area we'll have to spend more time on with her to help her get it. That we have high expectations in areas where she does excel. In this area, it's more of our job to help her get it - not to push her hard. She was appreciative. We gave tons of hugs and good nights and had a very affectionate night which was really great.
I truly think this weekend helped us realize that she may be testing us like crazy and she may be pushing many buttons, but she truly just wants to know if she is loved and if we care. It is not easy raising an eleven year old and especially challenging when they are going through some big changes that many kids don't go through. It's a challenging time and it's a big growth period. But she's going to handle it just fine. And we'll all come out stronger and more wise than we were when we started!
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