Gotta give some props to Kathryn and Madison! Madi worked very hard at Kathryn's house tonight finishing her IXL. The two sections I gave her to do over there went very fast and she was able to complete them in practically no time. She did the hardest one (skip-counting puzzles) and finished it!!! It is one she has been working on off and on for the last few weeks.
So very, very proud of her for pushing through something so hard and getting to the other side. So props up to you Madi!! And props to Kathryn for doing such a great job helping her finish and do those last few sections!!
Hopeful that as much as Madi hated doing it today, that the rewards of persevering will stick with her and she'll be encouraged the next time she comes up against something hard again. You can do it Madi! You can always do it! While this wasn't necessarily a spiritual test (maybe of sorts), there's a verse to remember for sure:
James 1:2
Dear brothers and sisters,a when troubles come your way, consider it an opportunity for great joy. 3For you know that when your faith is tested, your endurance has a chance to grow. 4So let it grow, for when your endurance is fully developed, you will be perfect and complete, needing nothing.
Madi definitely let her endurance develop today. Great job girl!!!!
Friday, August 5, 2011
Positive Thinking
Not quite sure how to sum up how the day went today. So I'll just recall how the day went. Madi is off to Kathryn's house and Kat was coming in the early afternoon to pick her up so they could hang out for a little while today.
Madi woke up and went to the computer. She was told that same rule applied today as yesterday - no games until her IXL was finished. She's been fighting us on trying to do it so we're trying to give her motivation to work towards getting some math practice in. And yesterday it worked. Today was a somewhat different story.
She started on her IXL. Instead of minutes, I gave her sections to complete. This way she is not watching her time and is more focused on just completing what is in front of her. There were six sections listed. Two of the sections she had already completed 75 and 79% of so there wasn't much left of them. Two of the sections were very easy. Two were somewhat challenging. Madi was great about jumping in and decided to get to it right away to finish. But she wasn't wanting to write anything down and wanted to lay down in her chair with her feet on the desk. Wasn't working for me and I asked her to sit up tall and to take her time and write down the problems and work through them. She glared at me and refused to write them down so I let her work through her choice on that. It didn't go very well.
For every question missed, the program sets you back so that it gives you more practice on the skill you need practice on. She did fabulous and fast on the fraction sections. So two down - four to go. She had a very, very, very hard time with skip counting problems and refused to write anything down. Wanted to do it all in her head. An example would be:
Kenton skip-counted, beginning at 5, until he reached 32. Which of these numbers could he have been counting by?
2
3
4
5
10
So Madi would have to start with number 5 and write out:
counting by 2's: 5 - 7 - 9- 11 - 13 - 15... etc.
And this would let her know if she would have been able to count by 2's to reach 32.
Instead she was doing it in her head. If she checked one of them wrong, it counted the whole thing wrong. I told her that I would help her if she would write it down and check her answers and I could then double check her work. But she wouldn't do it.
She got one answer wrong, put her knees to her chest and told me she had a headache. I told her that I'm sorry that she got the answer wrong, she did not have a headache and always tried that excuse any time that she didn't want to do something. She didn't say anything. So I told her to work through it, write it down and continue on. I told her that we don't always get everything right the first time and she would need to learn to work past her frustration and her one wrong answer and keep going. Instead she sat there. For minutes and minutes. I finally told her to take a break and get a drink or whatever and return to it. Or to start another section. She continued to just sit and pout and complain. So I told her that I don't do drama, I don't cave to pouting and that she could continue on now or take a short break. I gave her a little more time and she was still doing nothing. So I gave her some space and got the girls involved in some other things - Julia playing and Riley on her IXL stuff.
Madi kept whining and complaining. So I told her she just needed to try and get on with it and try. That she wasn't going to get out of it because was pouting. She glared again and I took the girls upstairs. Madi decided to start ripping her paper so I called down and said that it was not a good idea to start mistreating things and that I would be adding another section on - seeing that she was throwing fits and giving no effort and trying to manipulate the situation.
She wasn't happy about it, but went to work immediately. I added a very simple section that she soared through in no time. Then she got to a part where she got another answer wrong and repeated the whole process. Completely exhausting working through it with her and trying to be patient and matter of fact without getting angry with her about her attitude.
So she continued pouting and I tried to encourage her to do it and just told her that she needed to try and stop complaining. She went back to it and would not stop trying to manipulate trying to get out of it. She threw herself on the ground in front of the keyboard and just kept looking at me and moaning. So I added one more section on (super easy - she breezed through that one as well). My point was that complaining, manipulating and forcing tears was not going to work. It wasn't about the math at this point - it was about her effort and attitude.
She worked through every section - took her about 3 hours with all the attitudes and fits - except for one. She reached 86% on it and was told she could do it - keep going - etc... She was trying and trying to get it to where I would see her emotional and just cave. Then Kat came over.
Madi was told that if she didn't finish, she would have two more sections added to do at Kat's house tonight. Not about the math - everything to do with her trying to work out of it. I asked Kat what to do and she said why doesn't she just finish at my house. Madi was listening in the other room and cut off the tears immediately and was fine when I went to check on her - no tears, no pouts and she clearly thought that she had gotten out of it. I said that was fine, but shared what I had told Madi. She was fine with that and I went to talk with Madi. Madi looked at me and was like "ok." So she'll be finishing it tonight.
This isn't the most positive blog post to date, but lately, it has been tough around here. We're doing our best to help her prepare for school and to make right choices and she is fighting us on every level. I could have backed down from what she was asked to do today. I could have also made things harder by giving her sections that would have challenged her immensely when adding new ones on. But neither of those would have helped her.
She is trying anything and everything she can to get us to cave to her desires and to get out of things that are expected. We're holding tough and wanting her to know that we will be consistent and firm and loving. It really is to her benefit that she work through things (like IXL) because she gives up the first time it is hard or the first time she gets one answer wrong or when she just doesn't see why she should do it. None of her usual attempts at getting out of things are working and she's quite frustrated about it. Don't know how she tried to get out of things there, but she's trying about everything she can think of here.
When they left, I asked her for a hug and told her I loved her and that I was being tough on her because I loved her. If I didn't, I wouldn't be trying to help her make the right choices. I told her to have a great weekend - which they totally will.
I'm sure next week will be better and possibly having some time away will help all of us regroup. After all, no one said that every day would be perfect or easy. Feel free to message me on Facebook or call on Facetime to our computer at our house if you want to chat about today. Possible you may have handled it better than I did. Just did the best I could and tried to stay matter of fact and emotionally out of it so I didn't lose it.
This blog is quite down and negative. Sorry about that. I'll end by saying that I love Madi and she's an amazing girl. And she's growing in so many ways and so are we. Learning each day!
Madi woke up and went to the computer. She was told that same rule applied today as yesterday - no games until her IXL was finished. She's been fighting us on trying to do it so we're trying to give her motivation to work towards getting some math practice in. And yesterday it worked. Today was a somewhat different story.
She started on her IXL. Instead of minutes, I gave her sections to complete. This way she is not watching her time and is more focused on just completing what is in front of her. There were six sections listed. Two of the sections she had already completed 75 and 79% of so there wasn't much left of them. Two of the sections were very easy. Two were somewhat challenging. Madi was great about jumping in and decided to get to it right away to finish. But she wasn't wanting to write anything down and wanted to lay down in her chair with her feet on the desk. Wasn't working for me and I asked her to sit up tall and to take her time and write down the problems and work through them. She glared at me and refused to write them down so I let her work through her choice on that. It didn't go very well.
For every question missed, the program sets you back so that it gives you more practice on the skill you need practice on. She did fabulous and fast on the fraction sections. So two down - four to go. She had a very, very, very hard time with skip counting problems and refused to write anything down. Wanted to do it all in her head. An example would be:
Kenton skip-counted, beginning at 5, until he reached 32. Which of these numbers could he have been counting by?
2
3
4
5
10
So Madi would have to start with number 5 and write out:
counting by 2's: 5 - 7 - 9- 11 - 13 - 15... etc.
And this would let her know if she would have been able to count by 2's to reach 32.
Instead she was doing it in her head. If she checked one of them wrong, it counted the whole thing wrong. I told her that I would help her if she would write it down and check her answers and I could then double check her work. But she wouldn't do it.
She got one answer wrong, put her knees to her chest and told me she had a headache. I told her that I'm sorry that she got the answer wrong, she did not have a headache and always tried that excuse any time that she didn't want to do something. She didn't say anything. So I told her to work through it, write it down and continue on. I told her that we don't always get everything right the first time and she would need to learn to work past her frustration and her one wrong answer and keep going. Instead she sat there. For minutes and minutes. I finally told her to take a break and get a drink or whatever and return to it. Or to start another section. She continued to just sit and pout and complain. So I told her that I don't do drama, I don't cave to pouting and that she could continue on now or take a short break. I gave her a little more time and she was still doing nothing. So I gave her some space and got the girls involved in some other things - Julia playing and Riley on her IXL stuff.
Madi kept whining and complaining. So I told her she just needed to try and get on with it and try. That she wasn't going to get out of it because was pouting. She glared again and I took the girls upstairs. Madi decided to start ripping her paper so I called down and said that it was not a good idea to start mistreating things and that I would be adding another section on - seeing that she was throwing fits and giving no effort and trying to manipulate the situation.
She wasn't happy about it, but went to work immediately. I added a very simple section that she soared through in no time. Then she got to a part where she got another answer wrong and repeated the whole process. Completely exhausting working through it with her and trying to be patient and matter of fact without getting angry with her about her attitude.
So she continued pouting and I tried to encourage her to do it and just told her that she needed to try and stop complaining. She went back to it and would not stop trying to manipulate trying to get out of it. She threw herself on the ground in front of the keyboard and just kept looking at me and moaning. So I added one more section on (super easy - she breezed through that one as well). My point was that complaining, manipulating and forcing tears was not going to work. It wasn't about the math at this point - it was about her effort and attitude.
She worked through every section - took her about 3 hours with all the attitudes and fits - except for one. She reached 86% on it and was told she could do it - keep going - etc... She was trying and trying to get it to where I would see her emotional and just cave. Then Kat came over.
Madi was told that if she didn't finish, she would have two more sections added to do at Kat's house tonight. Not about the math - everything to do with her trying to work out of it. I asked Kat what to do and she said why doesn't she just finish at my house. Madi was listening in the other room and cut off the tears immediately and was fine when I went to check on her - no tears, no pouts and she clearly thought that she had gotten out of it. I said that was fine, but shared what I had told Madi. She was fine with that and I went to talk with Madi. Madi looked at me and was like "ok." So she'll be finishing it tonight.
This isn't the most positive blog post to date, but lately, it has been tough around here. We're doing our best to help her prepare for school and to make right choices and she is fighting us on every level. I could have backed down from what she was asked to do today. I could have also made things harder by giving her sections that would have challenged her immensely when adding new ones on. But neither of those would have helped her.
She is trying anything and everything she can to get us to cave to her desires and to get out of things that are expected. We're holding tough and wanting her to know that we will be consistent and firm and loving. It really is to her benefit that she work through things (like IXL) because she gives up the first time it is hard or the first time she gets one answer wrong or when she just doesn't see why she should do it. None of her usual attempts at getting out of things are working and she's quite frustrated about it. Don't know how she tried to get out of things there, but she's trying about everything she can think of here.
When they left, I asked her for a hug and told her I loved her and that I was being tough on her because I loved her. If I didn't, I wouldn't be trying to help her make the right choices. I told her to have a great weekend - which they totally will.
I'm sure next week will be better and possibly having some time away will help all of us regroup. After all, no one said that every day would be perfect or easy. Feel free to message me on Facebook or call on Facetime to our computer at our house if you want to chat about today. Possible you may have handled it better than I did. Just did the best I could and tried to stay matter of fact and emotionally out of it so I didn't lose it.
This blog is quite down and negative. Sorry about that. I'll end by saying that I love Madi and she's an amazing girl. And she's growing in so many ways and so are we. Learning each day!
Thursday, August 4, 2011
Summer, Summer, Summertime
Hot again. Nothing too new to say. Just plain hot.
Madi woke up around 6:45am and went downstairs to play her iPod games. Jeremy told her that before she could play on her iPod she had to do her IXL time since she had lied about it yesterday. She completed her time, and then some because she had to finish all the sections she started today (only 2, but they were hard for her). We're still having her do the third grade math. She tries to get out of it constantly, but does well when made to stick with it :)
We went to the library today and then to the mall. The girls turned in their reading logs at the library to get some free prizes - free meals and stuff from local places. At the mall, we got Riley some new school shoes as she has to have a certain type and the girls got headbands. Riley needed a few headbands to hide her new haircut on the left side. Will keep her 2" hair down :) Madi got one headband as it was cute and matched some of her outfits.
We got home and hung out. Jules was really tired and not feeling great today. A little under the weather with a runny nose and low-grade fever, but nothing serious. Had dinner together and then Jeremy read with Madi tonight.
She'll be going to Kathryn's tomorrow to stay with her for four days. She's looking forward to it and desperately hoping to see Harry Potter as we just have not had time to do it. We're sending her with her iPod so you can still chat with her if you want. We're also having her continue to do IXL while she's there and we'll check on it each night or at the end of the weekend. Since it's been many months since she's been at school, some of her retention is going, in math in particular, and so we want to make sure she's staying up on it so that there aren't difficulties that could be avoided. So far we've only done the third grade information and it's going pretty good. She's doing awesome at reading and verbally :) Never a struggle in either of those ;)
Madi has a very busy week next week:
Mon - Kat's
Tues - Kami's
Wed - Doug and Robin are here with their family so we'll be spending the whole day with them
Thurs - haircut for Madi
Fri - time with Mason
Sat - sleepover at Aimee's house - a girl who is in her class this year - her parents invited her over to swim and sleepover so they could all get to know her. I've known the family since Aimee was 2 and they are an awesome Christian family.
Sun - church and getting ready for school time wake up :(
Mon - playdate at Elizabeth's while I go back to work and the girls are at the Montessori school
She has a more active social life than we do! hahaha And we're so excited for her! She'll get to meet Mrs. Campbell on Thursday next week and I asked if she could help her get her room ready. Figure it'd be a great way for them to talk and get to know each other. I think she's gonna love her!
Madi woke up around 6:45am and went downstairs to play her iPod games. Jeremy told her that before she could play on her iPod she had to do her IXL time since she had lied about it yesterday. She completed her time, and then some because she had to finish all the sections she started today (only 2, but they were hard for her). We're still having her do the third grade math. She tries to get out of it constantly, but does well when made to stick with it :)
We went to the library today and then to the mall. The girls turned in their reading logs at the library to get some free prizes - free meals and stuff from local places. At the mall, we got Riley some new school shoes as she has to have a certain type and the girls got headbands. Riley needed a few headbands to hide her new haircut on the left side. Will keep her 2" hair down :) Madi got one headband as it was cute and matched some of her outfits.
We got home and hung out. Jules was really tired and not feeling great today. A little under the weather with a runny nose and low-grade fever, but nothing serious. Had dinner together and then Jeremy read with Madi tonight.
She'll be going to Kathryn's tomorrow to stay with her for four days. She's looking forward to it and desperately hoping to see Harry Potter as we just have not had time to do it. We're sending her with her iPod so you can still chat with her if you want. We're also having her continue to do IXL while she's there and we'll check on it each night or at the end of the weekend. Since it's been many months since she's been at school, some of her retention is going, in math in particular, and so we want to make sure she's staying up on it so that there aren't difficulties that could be avoided. So far we've only done the third grade information and it's going pretty good. She's doing awesome at reading and verbally :) Never a struggle in either of those ;)
Madi has a very busy week next week:
Mon - Kat's
Tues - Kami's
Wed - Doug and Robin are here with their family so we'll be spending the whole day with them
Thurs - haircut for Madi
Fri - time with Mason
Sat - sleepover at Aimee's house - a girl who is in her class this year - her parents invited her over to swim and sleepover so they could all get to know her. I've known the family since Aimee was 2 and they are an awesome Christian family.
Sun - church and getting ready for school time wake up :(
Mon - playdate at Elizabeth's while I go back to work and the girls are at the Montessori school
She has a more active social life than we do! hahaha And we're so excited for her! She'll get to meet Mrs. Campbell on Thursday next week and I asked if she could help her get her room ready. Figure it'd be a great way for them to talk and get to know each other. I think she's gonna love her!
Checking up
Each day I've been giving Madi a short list in the morning of things to accomplish and letting her do them. Trying to help her along the way with short, simple reminders, but trying to let it be hers to do. Then checking on them later and just trusting that she is getting them done when she says she is. So her list yesterday - to accomplish before 10:00am when Mason was coming - was:
1 - Make bed
2 - 20 minutes of IXL
3 - Get her swimsuit on, goggles, towel and tickets in one place
She made her bed and got everything ready. She did a few minutes of IXL and then returned to it later. She said she had 6 minutes to go and was going to do it. So she got it done and then told me she had finished her 20 minutes. Then left with Mason.
I didn't check on the IXL reports until last night after reading with her - just a busy day with the girls. The report showed that she had only done 15 minutes. So Jer and I talked for a little while and then went upstairs to talk with her.
There are two things we're trying to work on:
getting done what she needs to get done in a given time (teaching time management and responsibility with some guidance and encouragement)
telling the truth about what has been done
Both will serve her well in a few weeks when school starts and it will be important for her to have some practice with them.
When we shared that we had checked her IXL time and that it had only been 15 minutes, she was very quick to ask "How much do I have to do tomorrow?" which let us know that she was aware of it not having been finished yesterday. She didn't argue and was quick to understand that it hadn't been finished. Doing her study time is part of her allowance so I told her that she would be docked pay the next time she said it had been done and it hadn't.
She's sitting here with me now working on her IXL time on the laptop for today. She has 35 minutes to finish today. She has to complete the sections she has started even if 35 minutes has passed so that she learns to finish what she has started. We've noticed that she'll spend just a few minutes on a section (sometimes finishing it, sometimes not) and want to get her used to finishing what she's started. So it may be more than 35 minutes today depending on how the skills go. She's doing "Convert to a phone number from place values" right now. Jer told her that she can't have her iPod to play games until she has logged in the time for IXL. So far she's done a little over 20 minutes.
She'll call you in a little while or you can call her! We don't expect you to have to talk about all of it with her when she calls - we are handling it here - but do want to make you aware of what is going on so that you know how we've handled things and how the "day to day" stuff is going.
1 - Make bed
2 - 20 minutes of IXL
3 - Get her swimsuit on, goggles, towel and tickets in one place
She made her bed and got everything ready. She did a few minutes of IXL and then returned to it later. She said she had 6 minutes to go and was going to do it. So she got it done and then told me she had finished her 20 minutes. Then left with Mason.
I didn't check on the IXL reports until last night after reading with her - just a busy day with the girls. The report showed that she had only done 15 minutes. So Jer and I talked for a little while and then went upstairs to talk with her.
There are two things we're trying to work on:
getting done what she needs to get done in a given time (teaching time management and responsibility with some guidance and encouragement)
telling the truth about what has been done
Both will serve her well in a few weeks when school starts and it will be important for her to have some practice with them.
When we shared that we had checked her IXL time and that it had only been 15 minutes, she was very quick to ask "How much do I have to do tomorrow?" which let us know that she was aware of it not having been finished yesterday. She didn't argue and was quick to understand that it hadn't been finished. Doing her study time is part of her allowance so I told her that she would be docked pay the next time she said it had been done and it hadn't.
She's sitting here with me now working on her IXL time on the laptop for today. She has 35 minutes to finish today. She has to complete the sections she has started even if 35 minutes has passed so that she learns to finish what she has started. We've noticed that she'll spend just a few minutes on a section (sometimes finishing it, sometimes not) and want to get her used to finishing what she's started. So it may be more than 35 minutes today depending on how the skills go. She's doing "Convert to a phone number from place values" right now. Jer told her that she can't have her iPod to play games until she has logged in the time for IXL. So far she's done a little over 20 minutes.
She'll call you in a little while or you can call her! We don't expect you to have to talk about all of it with her when she calls - we are handling it here - but do want to make you aware of what is going on so that you know how we've handled things and how the "day to day" stuff is going.
Wednesday, August 3, 2011
Hawaiian Falls!!
Madi has been waiting for this ALL summer!! Mason and his mom came over to pick her up a little bit ago. We gave them three tickets to use at the park and they'll be gone most of the day. Mason is incredibly polite and his mom seems really nice. I think she'll have an awesome day. I just couldn't believe how tall he is!
This morning Madi had the best conversation by far with you. She got off the phone so excited and very positive about the talk. Think it was great that you were just able to enjoy talking with her and that she was responding better than she has been when you ask her things.
Madi is doing really great on her manners - saying thank you is coming more easily and "you're welcome" and "please." I made mention of it to her this morning and told her that she's using her manners really great and that I had noticed and appreciated it. She's also doing well with being a little more independent on her chores. It's only day 2 of trying to give her the responsibility and the time frame to get things done, but even today, she really got it. Just had to be reminded about what time it was (twice I let her know - no big deal) and asked how she was coming. She did 20 minutes of IXL this morning, made her bed and put her clean clothes away (just panties - super easy).
Then Mason got here and off she went! She had a blast. Being that the heat index was over 114, they spent most of their time in the lazy river. When they got to our house, I had left to take some pants back to Target so they went shopping at Ulta. Mason used some of his money to buy Madi some nail polish and stuff. I would take a guess that they definitely "like" each other. Will keep a close on eye on it, but it's quite innocent and cute. Just going to make sure it stays that way :)
Madi will be going over his house next Friday to see their home and the horses. So that'll be good for them to have one last time to hang out until school starts.
The rest of the night was fairly normal. Same routine as always. Madi and I read two chapters tonight of "Our Only May Amelia." Quite sad chapters tonight. Jeremy and Madi just finished a book about the Salem Witch Trials so they'll start a new one soon.
This morning Madi had the best conversation by far with you. She got off the phone so excited and very positive about the talk. Think it was great that you were just able to enjoy talking with her and that she was responding better than she has been when you ask her things.
Madi is doing really great on her manners - saying thank you is coming more easily and "you're welcome" and "please." I made mention of it to her this morning and told her that she's using her manners really great and that I had noticed and appreciated it. She's also doing well with being a little more independent on her chores. It's only day 2 of trying to give her the responsibility and the time frame to get things done, but even today, she really got it. Just had to be reminded about what time it was (twice I let her know - no big deal) and asked how she was coming. She did 20 minutes of IXL this morning, made her bed and put her clean clothes away (just panties - super easy).
Then Mason got here and off she went! She had a blast. Being that the heat index was over 114, they spent most of their time in the lazy river. When they got to our house, I had left to take some pants back to Target so they went shopping at Ulta. Mason used some of his money to buy Madi some nail polish and stuff. I would take a guess that they definitely "like" each other. Will keep a close on eye on it, but it's quite innocent and cute. Just going to make sure it stays that way :)
Madi will be going over his house next Friday to see their home and the horses. So that'll be good for them to have one last time to hang out until school starts.
The rest of the night was fairly normal. Same routine as always. Madi and I read two chapters tonight of "Our Only May Amelia." Quite sad chapters tonight. Jeremy and Madi just finished a book about the Salem Witch Trials so they'll start a new one soon.
Tuesday, August 2, 2011
Even Hotter
Was 100 degrees out when I dropped the girls off at 9am this morning. 103 by 11am. And now 109 outside. I'm sure you can relate. Just way too hot to get motivated to do anything!
Madi spent the day at Kami's house playing. I'll pick the girls up in two hours after my last few lessons are done for the day. Had time to write this afternoon so thought I'd take advantage of it.
That's all folks!
Madi spent the day at Kami's house playing. I'll pick the girls up in two hours after my last few lessons are done for the day. Had time to write this afternoon so thought I'd take advantage of it.
That's all folks!
Monday, August 1, 2011
Too Hot
109 with heat index of whatever it was today. Just plain too hot to do much of anything really. The girls (Julia and Riley) had a tough night of sleep. Riley woke up Jeremy at 5am and just couldn't sleep - probably due to her massive mosquito bites. Julia kept me up from 2-5am due to teething issues and being so incredibly hungry. The girl ate two bowls - one of cheerios and one of these garden vegetable puffs. We had run out of her food yesterday and so she ate pizza last night (two entire pieces herself), but apparently it wasn't enough as she just kept crying all night. I finally realized after going through everything I could think of that she was hungry and finally she was able to eat and then sleep and so was I.
The girls and I took a few trips out today - Target, the Dentist (to pick up my whitening trays), and school. First thing the girls did today was take baths. Madi had her bath in her bathroom while I did the girls in ours. Then we went up to Ethridge. She was able to meet a few teachers and the secretaries. I took her down her hallway so she could see where her classroom will be. Hopefully put her at ease a little more. She's very, very excited for school. We got her two lunch bags that are very hip today. And finished school supply shopping as well.
Went to Target and then went home. I've been feeling like I'm having to stay very on-top of Madi and her chores and study time and such. I've been reading an amazing book called "Children: the Challenge." Not sure if I mentioned it before. Came recommended by Ed, my friend and counselor at school. Gives some great insight into strategies in raising children to be independent, loving, caring, thoughtful, respectful, etc... one of the things the book talks about is allowing children to do for themselves what they can do. Not having to micromanage them, but giving them the confidence and freedom to do for themselves. Gives some great examples of conversations that are commonly heard in homes. We definitely relate to some of them - ha :) Kind of funny to read it and think "Oh! That sounds like me!"
So I went about things differently today. Rather than telling Madi "Now would be a great time to do your IXL math time. Or you should really go make your bed. Your towel is still on the floor. Can you pick it up please?," I made a short list of things she needed to accomplish today before 5pm and talked to her and wrote it down at the same time at 10am. So she had 7 hours to complete the tasks or she would lose $1 in allowance money. Here was the list:
1 - Make bed
2 - Hang up towel and robe in bathroom
3 - Do 45 minutes of IXL on the computer. Your choice of which topics you want to do. And each time at the computer had to be 15 minutes in length - didn't want her doing five minutes at a time as she wouldn't get very far and 15 minutes would allow her to focus in short intervals.
4 - Write a "Thank You" note to Karen and Elizabeth to give them tomorrow (plans were changed so she's going to do this one tomorrow)
And then I left her to do them. Her choice as to when to do them, but I would check at 5pm if they were all done. It was interesting because I had a hard time not checking up on her. Still asked two times through the day "How are you coming on stuff?" But other than those times, I simply let her figure out her day.
She made a plan to do IXL at 2pm, 3pm and 4pm on the hour. Though she tried several times to get me to only let her do 30 minutes or 40 minutes. I didn't budge and held firm knowing she'd try to get out of more if I even gave her an inch. It was fifteen minutes before 5pm when she needed to be finished. Everything was done on her time except IXL and she only had 6 minutes left to finish the full 45 minutes on IXL. She began trying to bargain and barter and asking if she could just do the last few minutes tomorrow. I told her that she was told to do 45 minutes today and that it'd be awfully sad if she got to 5pm and missed out on a $1 of allowance money because she gave up and didn't want to do 6 more minutes. She was frustrated I wouldn't give in, but she went in and did it and completed exactly 45 minutes. So good for her!!
Was great letting her be responsible for the things she needed to accomplish and will serve her well to be able to finish tasks with motivation other than us watching over her or telling her exactly what to do. She's really doing great!!
We ate dinner and then Madi and I went to Walmart just the two of us. Was good times. We got home, unloaded the car and she went up to get ready for bed. After I put everything away, I went up and we finished the chapter of the "May Amelia" book.
She'll go to Kami's house tomorrow and then to Hawaiian Falls with Mason on Wednesday. She's super excited about Wednesday!
The girls and I took a few trips out today - Target, the Dentist (to pick up my whitening trays), and school. First thing the girls did today was take baths. Madi had her bath in her bathroom while I did the girls in ours. Then we went up to Ethridge. She was able to meet a few teachers and the secretaries. I took her down her hallway so she could see where her classroom will be. Hopefully put her at ease a little more. She's very, very excited for school. We got her two lunch bags that are very hip today. And finished school supply shopping as well.
Went to Target and then went home. I've been feeling like I'm having to stay very on-top of Madi and her chores and study time and such. I've been reading an amazing book called "Children: the Challenge." Not sure if I mentioned it before. Came recommended by Ed, my friend and counselor at school. Gives some great insight into strategies in raising children to be independent, loving, caring, thoughtful, respectful, etc... one of the things the book talks about is allowing children to do for themselves what they can do. Not having to micromanage them, but giving them the confidence and freedom to do for themselves. Gives some great examples of conversations that are commonly heard in homes. We definitely relate to some of them - ha :) Kind of funny to read it and think "Oh! That sounds like me!"
So I went about things differently today. Rather than telling Madi "Now would be a great time to do your IXL math time. Or you should really go make your bed. Your towel is still on the floor. Can you pick it up please?," I made a short list of things she needed to accomplish today before 5pm and talked to her and wrote it down at the same time at 10am. So she had 7 hours to complete the tasks or she would lose $1 in allowance money. Here was the list:
1 - Make bed
2 - Hang up towel and robe in bathroom
3 - Do 45 minutes of IXL on the computer. Your choice of which topics you want to do. And each time at the computer had to be 15 minutes in length - didn't want her doing five minutes at a time as she wouldn't get very far and 15 minutes would allow her to focus in short intervals.
4 - Write a "Thank You" note to Karen and Elizabeth to give them tomorrow (plans were changed so she's going to do this one tomorrow)
And then I left her to do them. Her choice as to when to do them, but I would check at 5pm if they were all done. It was interesting because I had a hard time not checking up on her. Still asked two times through the day "How are you coming on stuff?" But other than those times, I simply let her figure out her day.
She made a plan to do IXL at 2pm, 3pm and 4pm on the hour. Though she tried several times to get me to only let her do 30 minutes or 40 minutes. I didn't budge and held firm knowing she'd try to get out of more if I even gave her an inch. It was fifteen minutes before 5pm when she needed to be finished. Everything was done on her time except IXL and she only had 6 minutes left to finish the full 45 minutes on IXL. She began trying to bargain and barter and asking if she could just do the last few minutes tomorrow. I told her that she was told to do 45 minutes today and that it'd be awfully sad if she got to 5pm and missed out on a $1 of allowance money because she gave up and didn't want to do 6 more minutes. She was frustrated I wouldn't give in, but she went in and did it and completed exactly 45 minutes. So good for her!!
Was great letting her be responsible for the things she needed to accomplish and will serve her well to be able to finish tasks with motivation other than us watching over her or telling her exactly what to do. She's really doing great!!
We ate dinner and then Madi and I went to Walmart just the two of us. Was good times. We got home, unloaded the car and she went up to get ready for bed. After I put everything away, I went up and we finished the chapter of the "May Amelia" book.
She'll go to Kami's house tomorrow and then to Hawaiian Falls with Mason on Wednesday. She's super excited about Wednesday!
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